


In You, I See Someone Beautiful

by MiracleDreamer



Category: Banana Bus Squad, Real Person Fiction, Youtubers
Genre: A Vent Fic, Anon Prompt, Basically Ohm is a troubled kid, I tried making up for it in the end, I wrote this when I was feeling like crap, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Sorry guys once again, Tumblr Prompt, and Bryce is his guardian angel, sorry this is sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-10
Updated: 2016-11-10
Packaged: 2018-08-30 03:52:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,279
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8517520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiracleDreamer/pseuds/MiracleDreamer
Summary: Ryan meets his guardian angel in one of his worst days.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is for an anon and it just turned sad for the first part. Sorry about that, I just had to cope and teenage Ohm going through hard stuff was my way to vent it all out. I hope the anon still likes this, somehow.

Ryan knew the exact place he met the angel. He remembered it clearly, a chilly August afternoon after school. It was the end of the first week, Ryan's mental state crumbling as he narrowly escaped the jeering insults thrown at him by classmates when he was left alone. Jonathan and Luke had left a while ago, an emergency from what Jonathan had said. Ryan assured them he would be fine, yet he lied, trying not to be a burden to the only two people who cared for him. It led to him hiding in a bathroom stall, sitting with his knees pulled up and breath ragged but soft, his bullies stalking and looking around but dumb enough to think the coast was clear, Ryan praising the lord when he hears their footsteps fade off into the distance.

 

Shakily, he stood up, hands pushing the door open. He caught a look of himself in the mirror, nose scrunching up. He would have fought them, but considering the last time they left him with a broken nose, he couldn't risk it anymore. His fingers pressed at the bandaid on the bridge of his nose, hissing at the burn of pain. He's picked fights with them before, Ryan not the one to go out without a fight unless he really wasn't in the mood for it. Today was one of those days, the darkness eating at his mind too much to be able to be mad at everyone.

 

People saw him as weird, an outcast in a school where a social caste was the norm. It was absurd to him, the idea of classes defining a growing and changing person absolutely ludicrous. Others didn't think his way though, the only two saviors that helped him not throw out his life Luke and Jonathan, two best friends who messed around and were the kindest people in the world. He met them during the summer, relishing in their different mindset and joking manner in the place they met, a library downtown that Ryan would usually spend his time in.

 

Ryan...didn't know how he became the target of bullying. It could be because of the way he dressed, which was normal except for his hoodie with bunny ears and bandana he would pull over his mouth, only taking it off in class. It could have been because he was kind and people liked to use that to his advantage, making him do their dirty work and if he refused, they'd force him into submission. Maybe it was because of his social class, Ryan a poor child living with his widowed mother who was distant and sadly still not over her dead husband, most weeks spent with her out of the house because she was out drinking and leaving Ryan to fend for himself. The other kids in his school were well off, snotty kids who did drugs and had sex parties without their parents knowing it. There was a few exceptions, like Luke and Jonathan, yet other than that everyone else was dull and horribly mean.

 

Ryan looked long and hard in the mirror, his eyes stained with the usual brown and blue, a particular scar running from his bottom lip to his chin. It was one he got earlier that week, a stupid asshole slicing a cut in him with a glass shard. It would've been worse if Ryan hadn't jumped out as quickly as he could, the guy backing off with one good punch. Why he had a glass shard, Ryan didn't know and didn't want to. He scratched at his face, his nerves slowly calming down as he tapped his foot impatiently. An idea came to mind to really stop thinking negatively but Jonathan would kill him if he tried, so he took deep breaths and focused hard on driving the snapping and snarling darkness away.

 

“Are you okay?” Ryan jumped, his head swiveling to the door and gasping. There, at the entrance, stood the new kid who he couldn’t recall the name of. He wasn't much to look at at first. A tall blonde boy with pretty blue eyes and long eyelashes, that's all there was to him. However, at that moment, he seemed to glow, a halo created around his whole person in a way to make him seem clean and different than the filthy plane they were standing on. He took a small step and Ryan took one backwards. Another step, one more backward. The third time was the charm, a sight so blinding and fantasy-like Ryan was sure he was imagining things.

 

Wings. Beautiful angel wings flapped into life, wings that sprung out of the back of the kid. He looked ethereal now, his person now fading into something akin to transparent. He glowed with a radiance, a miracle made in the hands of God and set in front of Ryan's unworthy eyes. The wings slowly curled behind the boy’s back, nestling in as if they needed a break from the show they gave him.

 

Ryan was ready to panic, his knees giving out and he fell onto the floor, scrambling backwards until his back hit the bathroom wall. The boy gave him a quizzical look tied with hurt and concern, slowly walking closer towards him. He seemed to glide, white and soft feathers falling around him like a shrine delved in cherry blossoms. Finally, when he was close, he crouched, Ryan meeting eyes he didn't think could be so precious.

 

“Are you okay?” He repeated his question, voice soft and silky, music coming out of a person without any effort put into it. Ryan couldn't answer, afraid his voice would mix in with the gorgeous lilt the boy had, his voice ugly and rough, flashbacks of when he would scream out of pain colliding into his eyes. The boy frowned, lips pursed slightly and he reached out.

 

“P-Please don't.” Ryan found his voice again, the boy stopping a mere hairbreadth away from his cheek. 

 

“I'm not going to hurt you, Ryan,” The boy whispered, his hand dropping and falling to reach Ryan's hand. His breathing hitched when the boy touched him, his skin soft and nothing like his own. He encased Ryan's right hand in both of his own, glancing back up to give Ryan a calming smile. He opened his mouth and whispered, “I'm your guardian angel, Ryan.”

 

Ryan wasn't sure as to how to react, so all he did was let out a pitiful gasp and felt his eyelids droop, his body slumping as he fainted. The last thing he saw was the evident shock in Bryce’s eyes as he drifted off into a fitful slumber.

 

____

 

_ When he opened his eyes, he was back to a place filled with terror. All around him was the imminent danger of loneliness bathed in swirls of black, nothing to fill the emotion of hope. He was standing on a concrete ground, knowing the dream wouldn’t end until he was suffocating in a room by himself and digging his nails into his skin. It always ended like that, so he heaved out a crippling sigh and trudged forward, soon enough a door appearing in front of him. The door was familiar, but not the kind that gave him a sense of security. No, it gave him dread and disgust, the dread of doing what he promised he wouldn’t do anymore staining his body in a prominent red glare. _

 

_ He put his hand on the door, the handle cold and unwelcoming yet it beckoned him with its ugly paws, cruel and cut with the evil doings of the world. He opened it and walked in, once again found in his bathroom, a bed of razor blades on the floor, calling his name with a sick joyful lilt in their voice. He would start crying, crying his eyes out and the white walls would cry with him too, streaks of blood red. Words would imprint themselves onto his skin, his arms scrawled with all the insults he’s endured by sneering kids. The words would also dance around him, mocking him and making his mental state tear, his flesh around his wrists and the soft skin on his thighs would start bleeding, red prints left on his arms and even on his neck. _

 

_ All he would see was bad memories and regrets, all of them yelling and screaming in his head, boggling him and making him see red. He didn’t want this anymore. Everything in like rough waves, one after another without any sign of stopping. The lights would flicker on and off and his bathroom sink would overflow with the grotesque color of scarlet, sending him reeling with ugly hideous retellings of his past. A razor blade would make it into his hand, cackling maniacally as it dug itself into his palm, the pain lessening the disturbing thoughts. He’d be lulled into a sense of comfort, knowing he had a way of ending it. He’d get on his knees and cut himself wherever he could, the thoughts dying down that yelled at him for being disgusting and worthless and soon he’d be swimming in his own pool of blood, the only thing left to do would be to slit his throat and he’d wake up around that time. _

 

_ He was about to finally finish his dream, until he flinched back, water pouring around him. He started to panic, the heaving of his chest starting to become painful as the water clogged his nose and ears. He wasn’t able to take note of how the water was clear, washing away the ugly scratches on his body and around him, the black swirls of death pulled off the walls and washed away.  _

 

_ Everything grew calm again, Ryan finally able to open his eyes and gasping when- _

 

He woke up.

 

He woke up coughing, shaking violently and he was close to screaming when he felt a warm hand clasp his own shaking ones. He looked up, eyes wild and afraid, only to meet the same blue irises he saw earlier today. The male was still looking like an angel, his wings out and spread behind him, the transparent hue still in effect on his body.

 

“Don’t worry, I tried my best to stop you from doing the last part. I’m still new at this physical guardian angel thing.” The boy chuckled, a lukewarm noise that made Ryan feel a bit better and fuzzy with warmth. He could feel the warmth all around his body, Ryan breaking eye contact to see himself in his room, the bed sheets changed and the boy sitting on his computer chair.

 

“...What last part?” Ryan questioned, the boy’s eyebrows shooting up and his face contorting into surprise.

 

“Your dream, silly! As a guardian angel, I must stay by your side at all times, and sometimes that means in your nightmares too.” The boy smiled at him, a pretty little smile that made Ryan’s heart melt.

 

But then he remembered what the boy claimed to be.

 

“You’re messing with me, aren’t you? What kind of makeup are you using? Did you buy those wings or make them?” Ryan sent him a distrustful glare, pulling his hands away and instead reaching to touch his wings. The angel boy was ready to back away, yet Ryan beat him, his fingers caressing the feathers and both of them gasping.

 

Soft. Incredibly soft. It was nice and it sent a calming jolt down Ryan’s spine, feeling instantly relaxed and he hummed. The boy held his breath, eyes wide with amazement until Ryan’s fingers left and he could breathe again.

 

“I’m real. I only want to protect you, Ryan,” The boy was gentle, once again taking Ryan’s hands into his own and looked at him with pleading eyes. “Please believe me.”

 

Ryan took in a shaky breath, nerves shuddering but only in little fits. He wasn’t sure what to think, but he couldn’t help but admit that the boy couldn’t be lying. He looked too pure to lie, something in his eyes saying he was to be trusted, even when Ryan knew better than to trust anyone. He couldn’t even trust himself at points, the flashbacks of being in the bathroom when he promised his friends to stop reminding him of broken regrets.

 

“I’ll...believe you for now.” The boy smiled at his answer, suddenly his face too close and Ryan cowered away, the angel realizing his discomfort and backing away. “Just...can you give me your name? I know you already introduced yourself at school but-”

 

“You weren’t listening, I know. I was watching you gaze out the window,” The boy finished for him, only to turn red when at his confession. Ryan blushed as well, looking away until he let out a small chuckle. It was odd, a strange miracle. He hasn’t laughed in awhile, a genuine laugh. He hasn’t even laughed with Jonathan and Luke, only giving them smiles and exasperated looks when they fooled around. The boy cleared his throat and finally answered, “It’s Bryce, my name is Bryce.”

 

“Bryce. That’s a nice name,” Ryan admitted, smiling slightly at the way Bryce grinned at him, his personality sparkling and embedded with a perkiness that Ryan knew would soon stick to him, as long as he stayed by his side.

“Now that you know who I am, just remember you’re the only one who can actually see my wings. Other people only see me as a normal student. Remember that, alright?” Bryce sat up, his smile still plastered on his face. 

 

“So you’re posing as a normal person?”

 

“Kind of. I’m not supposed to use this method but I felt like you needed a friend,” Bryce replied, honest with his reason. Ryan nodded slowly, chewing on his bottom lip momentarily before letting it go.

 

“So you’re saying I’m lonely?” Ryan didn’t mean to sound mean, but his defenses suddenly sprouted up, mood now painted in a sour green.

 

“No, no, I just meant...I wanted to be your friend too. You needed one and I wanted to be that friend,” Bryce defended, putting his hands up as if he was going to be arrested.

 

“I already have friends.”

 

“You do, but I think you need one more, and being the selfish person I am, I’m going to make me your friend too!” Bryce promised, eyes glittering as he set his hands on his hips, confident oozing around him.

 

Ryan stared at him, scrutinizing him before bursting into pure laughter, peeling at the sides to bloom out giggles and even a snort that made him blush like crazy. He was happy, riddled with a giddiness he hasn’t felt in years. The dread in his system suddenly faded away, now replaced with a merriness the angel in front of him somehow decorated him with.

 

“You’re one strange angel, you know that, right?” Ryan snorted at the way Bryce blushed, his hand instinctively going to rub at his neck. Locks of dirty blonde hair fell out of place, fascinating Ryan with how pretty Bryce actually looked. As an angel, he looked like he knew where he belonged, a shininess coating him and making him look heavenly. The halo above his head was barely visible, but there if he looked hard enough. Eyes as bright as the sky, Bryce looked like he was a piece of heaven himself.

 

“Well I’m sorry that you looked cute!” Bryce childishly pouted, only to realize he slipped again and he smacked a hand over his mouth, catching Ryan by surprise with the statement. Bryce was as red as a cherry now, even the tips of his ears going full cherry. Ryan shook himself out of the phase and shrugged, his lips falling as he stood up from his bed, passing Bryce and slowly moving to his mirror.

 

There, he gave himself a long hard look, pointing out all the flaws on his face in ten seconds. He turned back to Bryce and whispered, voice cracking at the end, “Bryce, I’m nothing.” He felt the storm of tears coming but swallowed them back, looking back at his disheveled state in the mirror. He wasn’t cute. He looked horrible, bags under his eyes bulging in his opinion. No, in the world’s opinion. His eyes were dull and rarely looked lively, like brown mud. His hair was always a rat’s nest, giving him the appearance of never combing it even when he tried. The scar at his bottom lip was nasty, still recovering and dried blood still knitted onto it. He looked useless, his hands clenching as he tried to cope with his own negative remarks.

 

“That’s not true,” Bryce mumbled, Ryan turning to see him right behind him. Bryce looked sad, the emotion not suiting his friendly eyes. He had to look up, the pretty angel taller than him, wings open again and Ryan yelped when they curled around his body, encasing him into a protective feathery shell with Bryce. The angel lightly put his hands on his shoulders and turned him around, back to staring at his repulsive image in the mirror.

 

“You’re beautiful, Ryan. You may not see it, but I see a handsome guy with soft-looking hair and alluring eyes. I see a guy who’s not willing to put up with people’s bull but will put up with anything that really is important. I see someone nice enough to give his love but never ask for anything in return. I see a fearless person who has battle scars because he doesn’t go down without a fight and always survives. I see someone who’s unique and beautiful and deserves everything in the world. I see you, Ryan.

 

“I can see that you’re a fantastic person, Ryan, even if you don’t. You’re someone who can’t accept these kinds of compliments, I know, but please believe me when I say them. I mean every word, Ryan. I know these things because I’ve watched over you since the day you came into this world, and only have had enough strength to appear to you like this because of your battles. I grew sick of standing at the side and asked to be able to physically protect you and here I am. Now I’m not going to fail at my job.”

 

While Bryce was saying all those things, Ryan started to cry, the tears wracking his body. He wasn’t sure why, but Bryce’s words touched him. The way he grabbed his hand midway through his speech pleased him, the way he leaned over Ryan’s shoulders to run a thumb on his scar made his heart beat faster, the way he said everything so honestly made his mind swim. Ryan knew he was vulnerable, but Bryce brought it to another level of vulnerable. This vulnerable made him feel safe, made him seek the comfort without having to be terrified of the outcome. He leaned into Brye, who was now hugging him from behind, cooing sweet words at him and Ryan knew he meant them all, his voice honest and nothing like the honey-sweet lies he’s been given so many times prior.

 

“Ryan, Ryan,” Bryce was now repeating his name like a mantra, soothing and refreshing. Ryan could only quiet down his sobs a little bit, his tears still going strong. Bryce slowly turned him around and cupped his cheek, planting a small kiss on his forehead.

 

“Don’t worry, I’m going to keep you safe now.”

 

Unlike the other people who promised him those words before, Ryan could actually believe Bryce. He held onto Bryce tight and nodded, his heart heavy but he felt safer than ever.

 

His guardian angel would protect him now.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. Please be careful.
> 
> Tumblr: fantasyeuphoriaandlace


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